Friday, November 6, 2009

Watchmen Didn't Change My Life

Have you heard of Watchmen yet?

If you haven't, I believe you have been sleeping under a rock of late (and if that is the case, dude, get out from under that rock already!) because Watchmen are here, whether you like it or not. March 6th after all is when the new Zach Snyder movie finally comes out, and many of you will be lining up in droves dressed like Nite Owl, or Silk Spectre, or Rorschach, or Dr. Manhattan...

But seriously, if you are going total "Blue Man", please do not get all literal and shit and forget the black briefs. I know that Allen Moore didn't paint a picture of a Manhattan with briefs like Snyder has (just watch the trailers), but there are some decency laws out there, and even if you live in Berkeley, you will be arrested.

The graphic novel on which this movie is based has been around for quite some time now, and why I haven't gotten around to reading it until now is beyond me. If you believe any of the quotes on the back cover, this is the graphic novel that was "so good the world ended on the day it was published".

That's a real quote. Look it up!

Okay, so it wasn't. But you get my drift.

My brother has a copy that I have been begging to borrow for quite some time. Not a worn out first edition signed by the author (if he even exists) mind you, but a 35th printing purchased on Amazon late last year, roughly six months after the hype began...

Did I mention that there is a movie forthcoming??

Did I mention that it's directed by Zach "300" Snyder??

Okay. Now that we have that out of the way, is reading the book necessary to prepare yourself for the movie? That's a really good question. I liked 300 just fine without ever reading Frank Miller's graphic novel of the same name. But where I am sure that Miller's epic is very good, was it really so good that "time literally stopped"??

And then I have to consider this: Did Alan Moore receive a dime of the proceeds of the $19.95 my brother sent to Amazon, much less a dime of the 16 bucks I spent at Denny's while reading it?

The answer to both of these questions is a resounding no. (Though I did tip my server appropriately, if only because she looked strikingly like Lena Headey who played Queen Gorgo in Zach Snyder's 300).

My world was not changed in any way shape or form, as promised.

Still, I will be there come opening weekend. I will spend my $9.50. And I will enjoy every minute of Watchmen. After all, Zach Snyder knows how to make comic book movies about comic books I don't care about.

Does that mean I will go dressed up as my favorite character?


I'm going as Dr. Manhattan in a Harkins Popcorn Shirt.

(But nothing else, save a can of baby blue spray paint).

If you want to know more, then it's time to dust off the old library card, cause that's all I's gonna say!

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